I'm really tired of being in the hospital

It has become a habit of mine to admit my faults to the congregation at FBCH. Today will be no different. I'm a control freak. I like to be in control of what is going on. I like to affect my circumstances and my life. Here in the hospital, I cannot do that, and it is killing me. I was just sharing with my mother, who came into visit me today in Jodi's absence that I have asked the doctors what I can do, more than any other question since I've been here. Currently, there is nothing I can do. God has to do it. That is hard for me. It is a struggle for me. I don't like not being in control.

And so here is the latest on me. The enzymes that denote pancreatitis are still high and in fact rising. Currently they are around 1500, which is twice as high as they should be. To make matters worse there is no really a good explanation as to why they are elevated. The Doctors are convinced that it is medically induced and that as a result of surgery the numbers are high. So currently I am what the medical community calls NPO, which to us lay people means I cannot eat... anything. I'm receiving nourishment through an IV, which is about as much fun as having my head stapled to the floor. My stomach growls and I cannot put anything in it. They are treating my pancreatitis by resting my digestive system and giving me steroiods. Pray that tomorrow the numbers will be lower, as they have steadily increased for the last three days.

In addition to the high levels of pancreatic enzymes there remains a hole in my thoracic cavity. I spoke with my Mom-mom today and shared with her about the hole in my lung. She asked, "Why is there a hole in your lung?" I told her, "because there used to be a big piece of fungus that they had removed, and now the space needs to be filled up with lung tissue, scar tissue, or diaphram." For some reason, my body isn't responding as quickly as the surgeons would hope.

Add these two complications together, and it means a longer hospital stay for me. Here is the latest: On Monday they will take a CT scan of my lungs. If the space has closed up (this needs to be your prayer), then they will pull the remaining chest tube, and I will be one step closer to coming home. If, however, the space in my lungs has not filled up, then they will consider performing an additional surgery to move the lung into place. This is the worst of the options awaiting my Monday scan. Please pray that surgery will not need to be an option.

As far as my pancreatic enzymes, they are doing blood work every day, and we are praying that the numbers will decrease beginning tomorrow. The good news is that I am asymptomatic with regard to my pancreatitis which means there is no nausea, vomiting, pain, or fever.

Jodi shared with me that there were some 50 women who met today at the church in order to approach the throne of God on my behalf. I'm humbled by how much you all love me and care for me. It is amazing to see a church that get "it." Please keep praying. Pray for the enzymes to return to normal. Pray for the spot to completely go away on Monday. Pray that I can come home soon. I miss my girls badly. I miss my wife (although she has only been gone 12 hours), and I miss my church. I cannot wait to see you all again.

I believe I am going to get to speak with you tomorrow via the wonderful world of the Internet. I will be praying for you all and your services as you praise God for His goodness. It is my goal to attend worship in the chapel here at the NIH. God bless you, and good night.